Bus Rides. Subtitle: The Idiot's Guide to Pushing a Bus
Though the trip will definitely be remembered fondly, I won't forget how awful many of the bus rides were. Whether it was the fact that the seats were often crammed so close together that it was impossible to put your legs in front of you, or the simple lack of cleanliness, at times I would have almost rather walked.
On the very first bus we took, from Kunming to Dali, we sat in rush-hour traffic for about an hour. A city of eight million people, the highway had two lanes. And donkeys. The sad thing is, they were moving as fast or faster than we were for much of the way.
The first bus ride I'd rather forget occurred on the trip back to Zhongdian from Deqin. Joining us for the ride were a pair of chickens and a pair of smelly dogs. I immediately felt like I was in a Borat movie set in China, but that feeling became stronger when, 20 minutes into the 7+ hour trip, one of the dogs whizzed all over the floor; this was repeated a number of other times, right next to me, which made for quite pleasant ride. Add that to the usual smokers and loogie hockers, and you can imagine I was soon ready to get off the bus.
After sitting in this bus, yes, I'd very much like to go to Australia!
The very next day came an even more exasperating ride. We awoke to a fresh blanket of snow but were told our bus from Zhongdian to Baishuitai would leave as scheduled, at 9am. What should have been a 3-hour trip max finally arrived 7.5 hours later at 4:30. I think I spent more time outside the bus than in it. The roads were snowy, but the bus handled them fine at first. But, as it continued snowing and we gained altitude, the bus began to have problems, and soon we were out pushing it along for the first of many (at least 10-12) times. What made matters worse was that every times we got the bus back on track, nearly everyone on board would light a celebratory cigarette. I have no doubt half of the Chinese population will have lung cancer within 30 years--maybe they have found a new solution to control the population, because the government seems to be doing nothing to discourage it. There had been two other foreigners on the bus, but they gave up after pushing the bus through the snow for the second time; I guess we should have seen it coming, considering they were French.
Everyone out! And debate what to do, after the bus becomes stuck the first time.
During the discussion process, I decided to leave my imprint, my name, in the snow.
I'm not sure about the whole pig, but its legs are definitely on board:
This is how the window looked for the entire bus ride. It really was the same temperature as outside since we had to get off the bus so many times.
The snow accumulating:
Another stop, another plan of action.
This was perhaps the third time the bus became stuck in the snow, and it took the longest to free it from its icy grasp. Everyone got out of the bus, and the bus made a run for the top of the hill.
Once it started slipping, we'd run up behind it and start pushing.
It would get a little traction and get ahead of us, but inevitably become stuck again.
This continued for the better part of an hour, but the bus was not able to round the corner at the top of the hill, and it was forced to back down its track after every failed attempt.
Tyler, exhausted:
And the bus about to swerve into a two-foot-deep ditch, which would have effectively ended our trip for the day. I'm not sure if another bus would have come or if we would have just had to camp out in that one, as Tyler said he once had to wait on a bus in China for 24 hours while it was broken down.
After other failed attempts to climb the hill, the bus driver had given up and turned the bus around, when along came another bus that made it right up the hill with no problems. With renewed vigor, the passengers (not I) demanded that the bus driver turn the bus back around and make another attempt. We gathered tree limbs and foliage for traction.
And waited anxiously for the bus to gather its steam.
And waited some more.
And then it went whizzing by, and we chased it...
Until it became stuck again. I'm not sure it you would call this persistence or stubbornness/stupidity, but it definitely became closer to the latter with each push of the bus.
At this point, Tyler and I are ready to hop on the first vehicle heading the other direction and go down to the tropical jungles of the southern part of the province, but unfortunately, no other vehicles came by after we made that decision.
I give up.
Following the bus again... Shouldn't we be on it?
The snow getting deeper:
Following the bus again after pushing it out of a rut. By the afternoon, the snow on the road was close to a foot deep.
And pushing it some more:
And following it some more.
Like I said, this happened more times than I have fingers, and I stopped counting. In the States, I would have expected someone to sue the bus operator for mental anguish and physical suffering, or at least demand a refund and multiple free trips in the future, but here, people were just happy to reach their intended destination, however late it may have been.
Though most of the other bus rides were tolerable (I spent 45 hours total on long-distance buses), the last one, an overnight bus from Lijiang to Kunming with beds that aren't quite the length of by body, should also be forgotten. About an hour before the bus departed, I got that unmistakable feeling in my stomach warning me of large quantities of time soon the be spent in the bathroom, but unfortunately, all that time had not been spent before the bus departed. I tried to fool my body and go to sleep as soon as I got on the bus, but it didn't believe me and a few hours later I woke up with a violent urge to go to the bathroom at that very moment. I frantically talked to the bus driver and discovered that there as a WC on board, and after more frantically searching in the dark to find it, I pulled open the door with no time to spare. As bad as the experience was, I'm sure it would have been made worse had I not found the bathroom in time.
On the very first bus we took, from Kunming to Dali, we sat in rush-hour traffic for about an hour. A city of eight million people, the highway had two lanes. And donkeys. The sad thing is, they were moving as fast or faster than we were for much of the way.
The first bus ride I'd rather forget occurred on the trip back to Zhongdian from Deqin. Joining us for the ride were a pair of chickens and a pair of smelly dogs. I immediately felt like I was in a Borat movie set in China, but that feeling became stronger when, 20 minutes into the 7+ hour trip, one of the dogs whizzed all over the floor; this was repeated a number of other times, right next to me, which made for quite pleasant ride. Add that to the usual smokers and loogie hockers, and you can imagine I was soon ready to get off the bus.
After sitting in this bus, yes, I'd very much like to go to Australia!
The very next day came an even more exasperating ride. We awoke to a fresh blanket of snow but were told our bus from Zhongdian to Baishuitai would leave as scheduled, at 9am. What should have been a 3-hour trip max finally arrived 7.5 hours later at 4:30. I think I spent more time outside the bus than in it. The roads were snowy, but the bus handled them fine at first. But, as it continued snowing and we gained altitude, the bus began to have problems, and soon we were out pushing it along for the first of many (at least 10-12) times. What made matters worse was that every times we got the bus back on track, nearly everyone on board would light a celebratory cigarette. I have no doubt half of the Chinese population will have lung cancer within 30 years--maybe they have found a new solution to control the population, because the government seems to be doing nothing to discourage it. There had been two other foreigners on the bus, but they gave up after pushing the bus through the snow for the second time; I guess we should have seen it coming, considering they were French.
Everyone out! And debate what to do, after the bus becomes stuck the first time.
During the discussion process, I decided to leave my imprint, my name, in the snow.
I'm not sure about the whole pig, but its legs are definitely on board:
This is how the window looked for the entire bus ride. It really was the same temperature as outside since we had to get off the bus so many times.
The snow accumulating:
Another stop, another plan of action.
This was perhaps the third time the bus became stuck in the snow, and it took the longest to free it from its icy grasp. Everyone got out of the bus, and the bus made a run for the top of the hill.
Once it started slipping, we'd run up behind it and start pushing.
It would get a little traction and get ahead of us, but inevitably become stuck again.
This continued for the better part of an hour, but the bus was not able to round the corner at the top of the hill, and it was forced to back down its track after every failed attempt.
Tyler, exhausted:
And the bus about to swerve into a two-foot-deep ditch, which would have effectively ended our trip for the day. I'm not sure if another bus would have come or if we would have just had to camp out in that one, as Tyler said he once had to wait on a bus in China for 24 hours while it was broken down.
After other failed attempts to climb the hill, the bus driver had given up and turned the bus around, when along came another bus that made it right up the hill with no problems. With renewed vigor, the passengers (not I) demanded that the bus driver turn the bus back around and make another attempt. We gathered tree limbs and foliage for traction.
And waited anxiously for the bus to gather its steam.
And waited some more.
And then it went whizzing by, and we chased it...
Until it became stuck again. I'm not sure it you would call this persistence or stubbornness/stupidity, but it definitely became closer to the latter with each push of the bus.
At this point, Tyler and I are ready to hop on the first vehicle heading the other direction and go down to the tropical jungles of the southern part of the province, but unfortunately, no other vehicles came by after we made that decision.
I give up.
Following the bus again... Shouldn't we be on it?
The snow getting deeper:
Following the bus again after pushing it out of a rut. By the afternoon, the snow on the road was close to a foot deep.
And pushing it some more:
And following it some more.
Like I said, this happened more times than I have fingers, and I stopped counting. In the States, I would have expected someone to sue the bus operator for mental anguish and physical suffering, or at least demand a refund and multiple free trips in the future, but here, people were just happy to reach their intended destination, however late it may have been.
Though most of the other bus rides were tolerable (I spent 45 hours total on long-distance buses), the last one, an overnight bus from Lijiang to Kunming with beds that aren't quite the length of by body, should also be forgotten. About an hour before the bus departed, I got that unmistakable feeling in my stomach warning me of large quantities of time soon the be spent in the bathroom, but unfortunately, all that time had not been spent before the bus departed. I tried to fool my body and go to sleep as soon as I got on the bus, but it didn't believe me and a few hours later I woke up with a violent urge to go to the bathroom at that very moment. I frantically talked to the bus driver and discovered that there as a WC on board, and after more frantically searching in the dark to find it, I pulled open the door with no time to spare. As bad as the experience was, I'm sure it would have been made worse had I not found the bathroom in time.
posted by Mysteries of The Orient at 2:49 AM
3 Comments:
I've been laughing myself silly, though I know it probably wasn't funny at the time. How are you doing?!
Hahaha, you should publish this entry in a newspaper or something. I kept on thinking, that if you dont have traction going up, how they ever slow the momentum going back down. But sounds like you are having a lot of fun, keep updating!
Samar
Muy interesantes todas tus aventuras! y otras no muy divertidas,como la del autobus en la montana nebada, tener que empujar esa cosa con tanto frio...
Es un buen documental de tu vida en china,Sigue disfrutando!.
Gabriel.
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